Something Awful

Updated Every Monday

Jeff K.'s weekly column, appropriately entitled "Ask Jeff K.", deals with all the issues that affect hardcore gamers and l33t haX0rs out there. If you have a question you'd like to ask, feel free to email it in. Every letter printed here is in fact real and has actually been sent to Jeff; not a single email has been fabricated or created by the staff.

Let me repeat that again for the sake of emphasis: All of these emails have really been submitted to Jeff K. by real people and have NOT been made up or forged in any way.

Seafurby Cyclops - 3.27.00
Flying toasters, fan clubs, eating John Carmack's head, killer goth kids from Hell, humping diaper changing stations, alcoholism, Everquest, "The Jetsons", and personal beauty. It's all jam packed into two action-filled pages of intellectually stimulating brain candy!

Gaming Extravaganza! - 3.20.00
Grammar, Daikatana, Killcreek, Paul Steed, zombies, UFOs, spelling, Unreal Tournament, and John Carmack's sexuality. It's a veritable bonanza of l33tness!

All About The HaX0ring - 3.13.00
Jeff tackles more flame mail, rabid fans, and his favorite Pokemon.

Firsties! - 3.04.00
Jeff K. kicks off the start of his new column by answering questions about his birthday, an obsession with "fags", Back Orifice, Q3A mapmaking, and being l33t (go figure).

Have a question or problem? Email him!