Date: Mon, 21 Jul 2003 20:38:14 -0700 (PDT) From: M Monte (mcmonte19@yahoo.com) Subject: Some things that need to be fixed on your site. To: jericho@attrition.org After reviewing your website I found a lot of the material would not be approved by my mother. She doesn’t like me exposing myself to such foul language. So here is a list of words I would like you to omit from your site. I know it is a lot to ask, but I am only 23 years old, and I feel these should be taken into consideration so our maturing adults can grow up in a decent world: Please do not reference male genitals with any of the following terms: AARON'S ROD ARM BABY-MAKER BEEF BLUE VEIN MEATROLL BALD-HEADED BUTLER BALD-HEADED MOUSE BELLY BUSTER BATHTUB EEL BEARDED BLOOD SAUSAGE BIRD BONE BALONEY BANANA BAT BAYONET BEAN TOSSER BEEF BELLY RUFFIAN BLADE BROOMSTICK BUM TICKLER BUSH BEATER BUTTON-HOLE WORKER COCK CANDLE CARROT CLUB CRACK HAUNTER CRANNY HUNTER CRACKSMAN CREAMSTICK CULTY GUN CARNAL STUMP CHICKEN CHILD-GETTER CHINK-STOPPER COREY CROOK DICK DORK DONG DONIKER DINGUS DIPSTICK DAGGER DART OF LOVE DEAREST MEMBER DICKY DING-DONG DINGER DINGLE-DANGLE DUMMY DODADDY DOLLY DOOFLICKER DOWN-LEG DRAGON EEL END FAMILY ORGAN FIDDLE BOW FISH FISHING ROD FLAPPER FOOL-STICKER FOREFINGER FUCKER FOREMAN GUN GUT WRENCH GIGGLE STICK GADGET GARDENER GIGGLING PIN GOOSER GRAVY MAKER GRINDING TOOL GRISTLE GUT STICK HAIR SPLITTER HAMBONE HAMMER HANGING JOHNNY HOE HANDLE HOLY POKER HORN HOSE HOT ROD HEAT-SEEKING MOISTURE MISSILE HAIRY HOT DOG JACK IN THE BOX JEMSON JERKING IRON JIGGER JING JANG JOCKAM JOHNNIE JOHNNY ONE-EYE THE BALD-HEADED CHAMP JOHNSON JOINT JOY KNOB JOY PRONG JOY STICK KEY KIDNEY CRACKER KIDNEY WIPER KIELBASA KING MEMBER KNOB KNOCKER LADIES' DELIGHT LADIES' LOLLIPOP LADIES' TREASURE LAMP OF LIFE LANCE LIFE PRESERVER LITTLE BROTHER LITTLE WILLIE LIVER TURNER LIVE SAUSAGE LIZARD LOB LOBCOCK LOBSTER LOLLYPOP LONG JOHN LOVE DART LOVE GUN LOVE MUSCLE LUCY LUNG DISTURBER MAD MICK MAGIC WAND MAN-ROOT MARROW BONE MASTER JOHN THURSDAY MASTER OF CEREMONIES MEAT MEAT HOOK MEAT WHISTLE MEMBER MERRYMAKER MIDDLE LEG MILKMAN MISTER GOODWRENCH MISTER TOM MOUSE MUSCLE MUTTON DAGGER MY BODY'S CAPTAIN NATURAL SCYTHE NEEDLE NIMROD NIPPY NOODLE NOONY OLD BLIND BOB ONE-EYED NIGHT CRAWLER IN THE TURTLE-NECK SWEATER ONE-EYED MILKMAN ONE-EYED TROUSER TROUT ONE-EYED WONDER WORM PANT MUSCLE PECKER PEE-PEE PEN PENCIL PENDULUM PERCH PETER PICCOLO PICKLOCK PIKESTAFF PILE DRIVER PIN PINK PENCIL PIPE PISSER PISTOL PLUGTAIL POCKET PICCOLO POCKET ROCKET POINTER POKER POLE PORK PORK SWORD POST PRICK PRIDE AND JOY PRONG PUD PUDDING PUMP HANDLE PURPLE-HELMETED WARRIOR OF LOVE PUP PUTZ QUICKENING PEG QUIMSTAKE RAM RAMROD RAW MEAT REAMER RED CAP ROD ROD OF LOVE ROLLING PIN ROOT RUDDER RUPERT RUSSELL THE WONDER MUSCLE ST. PETER SALAMI SAUSAGE SCEPTRE SCHLONG SEXING PIECE SHAFT SHMOCK SHORT ARM SHOVE DEVIL SHVONTZ SILENT FLUTE SKIN FLUTE SNAKE SPIGOT SPIKE-FAGGOT SPINDLE SPOT-RUMP SPOUT STAFF STEAMING HOT KANGA STEM STICK STING STUMP SUGAR STICK SWORD TAIL PIN TALLY-WHACKER TASSEL TENT PEG THING THIRD LEG THISTLE THROBBER THROBBING PYTHON OF LOVE TICKLE-GIZZARD TICKLER TONG TOOL TORCH OF CUPID TOY TRAP-STICK TROUSER ANACONDA TUBE STEAK UNCLE DICK VOMITING COBRA WAND WANG WAZOO WEAPON WEDGE WEENIE WHACKER WHIP WHISTLE WHORE-PIPE WICK WILLIE WINKLE WIRE WORM YANG YARD YOSH ZUBRICK When referencing a WELL ENDOWED male, please refrain from the following: BASKET FOR DAYS DONKEY-RIGGED DOUBLE-SHUNG HUNG LIKE A BULL MIRACLE MEAT TIMBERED TONS OF BASKET TONS OF MEAT WELL-FAVORED BY NATURE WELL HUNG YARD When talking of semen please don’t use: BABY FOOD BABY JUICE BULL GRAVY BUTTERMILK CHISM COME CREAM CRUD CUM DUCK BUTTER FETCH GLUE GRAVY HOCKEY HONEY HOT MILK JAM JAZZ JELLY JISM JUICE LETCH WATER LOAD LOVE LIQUOR MAN OIL MARROW METTLE MILK OIL OF MAN OINTMENT OYSTER PRICK JUICE PUDDING SCUM SEED SLIME SOAP SPENDINGS SPERM SPEW SPRATZ SPUME SPUNK STARCH STUFF TAIL JUICE TAIL WATER TALLOW WAD WHITE BLOW WHITE HONEY PEARL NECKLACE PECKER TRACKS WET DREAM If you need to reference ejaculation please abstain from: BIG BANG BUST YOUR NUTS COME COME OFF CREAM CUM DIE IN A WOMAN'S LAP DROP YOUR LOAD FIRE A SHOT GET OFF GET THE DIRTY WATER OFF YOUR CHEST GET WET GET YOUR COOKIES GET YOUR JOLLIES GET YOUR ROCKS OFF GO OFF NUMBER THREE POP A NUT SHOOT SHOOT OFF SHOOT YOUR WAD SPEND SQUIRT If testicles or scrotum must be referenced, please avoid: BALLOCKS BALLS BANGERS BEECHAM'S PILLS BIRD'S EGGS BOO-BOOS CHARLIES CHERRIES CHESTNUTS CLANGERS COJONES CUBES DANGLERS EGGS FAMILY JEWELS GLANDS GOOLIES JEWELS KANAKAS LOVE APPLES MARBLES MARSHMALLOWS NARDS NUTS ONIONS PLUMS POUNDERS ROCKS SEEDS SLASHERS SPUNK HOLDERS SQUIRREL FOOD STONES SWINGERS BALL BAG HAIRY BAG POKE SACK When talking of crab lice, please maintain medical terms, not: ACTIVE CITIZENS CRABS CROTCH CRICKETS GENTLEMEN'S COMPANIONS NEIGHBORS TO THE SOUTH PANTS RABBITS SEAM SQUIRRELS If syphilis needs to be mentioned, again stay medically correct. The following would be unacceptable: COACHMAN ON THE BOX FRENCH GOUT IRISH MUTTON LADIES' FEVER LIFELONG FRIEND NEAPOLITAN BONE ACHE OLD JOE SIFF SPANISH NEEDLE THE OLD DOG The same goes with Gonorrhea, avoiding these terms: BURNER CLAP DOSE GLEET GLIM HAIRCUT LUES LULU MORNING DROP PISS PINS AND NEEDLES PISS PURE CREAM STANK COCK STRAIN TEAR As for female genitals, the following terms should not be used: ACE OF SPADES ADAM'S CAVE ALTAR OF LOVE BEARDED CLAM BEAVER BELLY ENTRANCE BLACK BESS BLUEBEARD'S CLOSET BOX BROWN MADAM BULL'S EYE BUNNY BUSH BUTTON HOLE CABBAGE PATCH CANAL CANDLE HOLDER CAT'S MEAT CAVE OF HARMONY CAVERN CELLAR DOOR CHOCHA CLEFT CLUTCH COCKPIT COOKIE COOT COOTCH COOZE COUPLER CRACK CRANNY CREASE CREVICE CROTCH CRUMPET CUNNY CUNT DIMPLE DmNE SCAR DONUT DRAIN EEL-SKINNER FISH TANK FLYTRAP FORT BUSHY FRONT WINDOW FUR FURBOX FURBURGER FURROW GAP GAPER GASH GATE OF HEAVEN GINCH GINNY GIRL-STREET GOAT-MILKER GRAVY-MAKER GULLY-HOLE HAIR HAIRCOURT HAIR PIE HAPPY VALLEY HARBOR OF HOPE HATCH HOG EYE HOLE HONEY-HIVE HONEY-POT HORSE COLLAR HOT BOX HOT SPOT HOUSE UNDER THE HILL IRISH FORTUNE ITCHING JENNY JACK NASTY-FACE JAXY JELLY-ROLL Jl)ICE BOX KEYHOLE LADY JANE LAMP OF LOVE LAPLAND LATHER-MAKER LITTLE MARY LOCKER LONG-EYE LOVE TUNNEL LOWER LIPS MAGPIE'S NEST MAIN VEIN MANHOLE MARK OF THE BEAST MEAT MEAT GRINDER MOM'S HOMEMADE SLIT PIE MOUND MOUNT PLEASANT MOUSE MOUTH-THAT- CANNOT-BITE MUFF NAF NATURE'S TUFTED TREASURE NEST NICHE NOOK NOOKY NOTCH OAT-BIN OLD MOSSYFACE ORGAN GRINDER OVEN OYSTER CATCHER PATCH PELT PENWIPER PIE PIECE PIN CUSHION PIPE CLEANER PISS FLAPS PIT PLAYPEN POCKET POKE HOLE POONTANG POOR MAN'S BLESSING PRICK PURSE PUSSY QUIFF QUIM QUIVER ROSE SCREW-HOLE SLASH SLIT SLOT SNAPPER SNAPPIN' PUSSY SNATCH SNATCH-BOX STANK STEAM ROOM STUFF SOCKET SPORTSMAN'S GAP SUGAR BASIN TAIL TEMPLE OF LOW MEN TOOL-CHEST TOY SHOP TREASURE CHEST TRENCH TRIANGLE TRIM TUBE TUNA TACO TUNNEL TUNNEL OF LOVE TWAT TWEEZE TWITCHER VAG VALLEY VENUS HIGHWAY VERTICAL SMILE WET CAVE OF LUST WOOLY-BOOGER WORKS YAWNIE YUM-YUM When talking of a woman’s breasts, none of these terms should ever be used: APPLES BALCONY BALLOONS BANGERS BAZONGAS BAZOOMS BEAN BAGS BIG BROWN EYES BON-BONS BOOBIES BOOBS BOTTLES BOULDERS BULLETS BUMPERS BUSTERS BUTTERBAGS CANTELOUPES GAZONGAS GLANDS GLOBES GRAPEFRUITS GUAVAS HANDFUL HAND-WARMERS HEADERS HEADUGHTS HILLS HONKERS HOOTERS HOWITZERS JABOOS JIBS JUGS JUMBOS KAZONGAS KNOBS KNOCKERS LACTOIDS LOAVES LOBLOLLIES LOVE BUBBLES LOVE MUFFINS LULUS LUNGS MAMMETS MAMS MANGOES MEATBALLS MEAT LOAVES MELONS MILK CANS MILK SHOP MOUNDS MOUNT OF ULIES MOUNTAINS MUFFINS MULLIGANS MURPHIES NANCIES NATURE'S FONTS NIBLETS NINNIES NIPPERS NODULES NOOGIES NUBBIES NUTS ORANGES ORBS OTTOMANS PAIR PALOOKAS PAPAYAS PAPS PEACHES PEAKS PEARS PECTS PEEPERS PILLOWS PIPS POKERS PONTOONS POTATOES PUMPKINS PUMPS RIB CUSHIONS ROUNDIES SANDBAGS SCONES SCOOPS SET SHAKERS SHIMMIES SKIN SACKS SNUGGLE PUPS SPHERES SPUDS STACKS STUFFING SWEATER MEAT SWEET ROLLS SWINGERS TAMALES TETONS TIDBITS TITS TITTERS TI=IES TOMATOES TOOTERS TORPEDOES TWANGERS TWIN PEAKS TWOFERS UMLAUTS UPPER DECK WALDOS WARHEADS WARTS WATERMELONS WHOPPERS WOBBLERS WONGAS YABBOS YAMS ZEPPELINS Menstruation should not be described with any of the following: AUNT FLO AUNT ROSIE IS IN TOWN ALL'S NOT QUIET ON THE WATERFRONT BLOOD WEEK COLLYWOBBLES CURSE OF EVE DRIP ENTERTAIN THE GENERAL FALL OFF THE ROOF FLYING THE FLAG HAVING THE PAINTERS IN HIGH TIDE HOLY WEEK JINX UTTLE SISTER IS HERE MONTHLIES MY BUDDY MY FRIEND ON THE BUN ON THE POLE ON THE RAG PERIOD PROBLEM RAGGING RAGTIME RED FLAG RED SAILS IN THE SUNSET RIDING THE COTTON BICYCLE RIDING THE COTTON PONY ROAD UP FOR REPAIRS SICK STOP SIGN TAIL FLOWERS THAT TIME THAT WAY THE CAPTAIN IS AT HOME THE CURSE THE FOE THE HAMMOCK IS SWINGING THE PLAGUE THE THING THE VISITOR TURNS WEARING THE BULKY ROLL WOMAN'S HOME COMPANION Sanitary Napkins should be referred to by brand name or as “sanitary napkin”, none of the following please: BANDAGE CLOUT CUNT RAG FANNY RAG FLAG GRANNY RAG MAN HOLE COVER MOUTH MATTRESS MUCK RAG MUTT RAG PLEASURE GARDEN PADLOCK RAG RED FLAG WINDOW BLIND Fornication should be spoken of with the respect and seriousness that it deserves, the following terms are inappropriate: A BIT OF JAM ACTION BALL BALLOCK BALONEY RIDE BANANAS AND CREAM BANG BASKET MAKING BATTER BEEF BEEF INJECTION BE IN A WOMAN'S BEEF BELLY RIDE BELT BLANKET DRILL BLOW OFF THE LOOSE CORNS BOARD BOFF BONE BORE BOTTLE BOUNCE BUMP BUMP FUR BUNNY FUCK BURY ONE'S WICK BURY THE BONE BUSH PATROL BUZZ THE BRILLO CANE CHANGE ONE'S LUCK CHARGE CHUCK A TREAD CLIMB COCK UP COME ACROSS COUPLE WITH COVER CRACK IT CRAM CRAWL CREAM CUT DANCE THE MATTRESS nG DAUB OF THE BRUSH DICK DICKY DUNK DIDDLE DIP YOUR STINGER IN THE HONEY DIP YOUR STICK DIP YOUR WICK DIRTY WORK AT THE CROSSROADS DO DO A DIVE IN THE DARK DO A FLOP DO A PUSH DO A SLIDE UP THE BOARD DOG DO IT DO THE DEED DO THE NASTY EASE NATURE EXCHANGE SPITS FEATHER-BED,nG FEED THE DUMMY FIDDLE FIRK FIT END TO END FIX HER PLUMBING FLESH SESSION FLOP FLOP IN THE HAY FOUR-LEGGED FROLIC FRIG FUCK FUN AND GAMES GET A BIT GET A CHUNK GET A CRUMPET GET A HUNK GET A LITTLE GET A PIECE GET A SNIPPET GET A WET ONE GET HOME GET IN GET INTO HER PANTS GET INTO SOME SERIOUS FLESH GET IT ON GET JACK IN THE ORCHARD GET LAID GET L0CKY GET ONE'S ASHES HAULED GET ONE'S GREENS GET ONE'S LEATHER STRETCHED GET ONE'S NOODLE WET GET ONE'S OIL CHANGED GET SOME GET SOME ACTION GET SOME ASS GET SOME CRACK GET SOME HAIR GET SOME HOLE GET SOME PUSSY GET SOME STUFF GET SOME TAIL GET SOME TWEEZE GET YOUR BEAN WAXED GET YOUR POLE VARNISHED GIVE HER A STAB GO ALL THE WAY GO LIKE A BELT-FED MOTOR GO TO BED WITH GO TO IT GO TO TOWN GO VAULTING GREASE THE WHEEL GRIND GRIND ONE'S TOOL HANKY-PANKY HAVE HAVE A BIT HAVE A BIT OF GIBLET PIE HAVE A BIT OF SUMMER CABBAGE HAVE A BLOW THROUGH HAVE SEX WITH HIDE THE FERRET HIDE THE SALAMI HIT ON THE TAIL HOCK HOP ON HORIZONTAL REFRESHMENT HOSE HOT ROLL WITH CREAM HUMP IMPALE INTRODUCE CHARLEY INVADE IRISH WHIST JAZZ JINK JOB JOIN PAUNCHES JOUNCE JOY RIDE JUG JUKE JUMP JUMP ON ONE'S BONES KNOCK KNOCK OFF A PIECE KNOW LADIES' TAILORING LAY LAY OFF WITH LAY SOME PIPE LAY THE HIP LAY THE LEG LEAP LEAP ON LIE ON LIE WITH LOB IN LOVE MAKE MAKE FEET FOR CHILDREN'S SHOES MAKE IT MAKE LOVE MAKE OUT WITH MAKE THE SCENE MAKING BABIES MAKIN' WHOOPEE MATE MESS AROUND MINGLE LIMBS MIX ONE'S PEANUT BUTTER MOUNT MUG MUSS NAIL NAIL TWO BELLIES TOGETHER NICK NIG NUB NUG NUT OBLIGE OFF PARK YOUR YACHT IN HAIR HARBOR PEEL ONE'S BEST END PEG PERFORM PESTLE PIECE PIECE OF ASS PIECE OF PUSSY PIECE OF SNATCH PIECE OF TAIL PILE PILE-DRIVING PIN PLANT THE OATS PLAY AT ALL FOURS PLAY HIDE THE BONE PLOW PLUCK PLUG POCKET THE RED POKE POLE POLE WORK POUSH YOUR ROCKET POP PORK POST A LETTER POUND PUMP PUNCH PUSH PUT THE BOOTS TO PUT THE TOOL IN THE SHED QUIMSTICKING RAM RIDE RIP OFF RITES OF VENUS ROASTING THE BROOMSTICK ROLL ROLL IN THE HAY ROCK ROD ROGER ROMP ROOT ROOTLE ROUST RUB BACONS RUB UP RUMBLE RUMPLE RUTTING SALT SAW OFF A CHUNK SCORE SCREW SCUTZ AROUND SECRET SERVICES SERVICE SHACK UP SHAFT SHAG SHAKE SHAKE THE SHEETS SHOOT BETWEEN WIND AND WATER SHOOT ONE'S WAD SHORT ARM PRACTICE SHOVE SHTUP SINK THE SAUSAGE SINK THE SOLDIER SLAM SLEEP WITH SLIP HER A LENGTH SLIP INTO SPLIT SPOIL SQUAT JUMPS IN THE CUCUMBER PATCH SQUATTIN'ON THE HOG SQUEEZE AND A SQUIRT STAB STABLE MY NAGGIE STROP ONE'S BEAK STRUM STUFF SWING TAIL-WORK TAKE A TURN IN THE STUBBLE TAKE A TURN ON SHOOTER'S HILL TEAR OFF A PIECE TEAR THE SHEETS THE DISAPPEARING CANE TRICK THE MATRIMONIAL POLKA THREAD THREAD THE NEEDLE THROW A HUMP THROW A LEG OVER THROW A SHOT THUMP TIE THE TRUE LOVER'S KNOT TIFF TIP THE LONG ONE TO BE INTIMATE TOOLING IN THE WOODS TOPS AND BOTTOMS TRIM TRIM THE BUFF TRIP UP THE RHINE TUMBLE TUMPLE TURN UP TWIDDLE VARNISH ONE'S CANE VAULT VITAMIN F WAP WHAM WHAT MOTHER DID BEFORE ME WIND THE CLOCK WOMANIZE WORK WORK OUT WORK THE DUMB ORACLE WORK THE HAIRY ORACLE YARD YENTZ Please do not refer to prostitutes as any of the following: ASS PEDDLER BACHELOR'S WIFE BANGSTER BARRACK HACK BIMMY BIRD BISCUIT BLOUSER BOB TAIL BOONG MOLL BROAD BUNNY BURLAP SISTER BUSINESS GIRL BUTT-PEDDLER CALL GIRL CANNON WOMAN CANVASBACK CHIPPY COCK-EYED JENNY COFFEE GRINDER COME-CATCHER COMMON SEWER COMPANY GIRL CRACK SALESMAN CRUISER DOOR KEEPER DRESS FOR SALE EARLY DOOR ERRING SISTER FALLEN WOMAN FAST-FANNY FAST WOMAN FERRY FLAG-ABOUT FLASH-TAIL FLATBACKER FLAX-WENCH FLESH POT FLOOSIE FORESKIN HUNTER FRAIL SISTER GARBAGE CAN GIRL AT EASE GUINEA HEN HARLOT HARPIE HAT-RACK HAY-BAG HOOKER HOSE-BAG HUNT-ABOUT HUSTLER JOY GIRL LADYOF THE EVENING LEASE-PIECE LIVESTOCK LOOSE FISH LOWHEEL MATTRESS MERRY-LEGS MOONLIGHTER MOTH NEEDLE-WOMAN NIGHT JOBBER NOCKSTRESS NOTCH-BROAD NYMPH OF DARKNESS OLD RIP OVERNIGHT BAG PAINTED WOMAN PAVEMENT PRINCESS PIECE PIECE OF TRADE PINCH-PRICK PINTLE-TWISTER POKER CLIMBER PRO PROSSY PUNCHABLE NUN PUTA QUAIL QUIFF RASPBERRY TART RECEIVER GENERAL RED-LIGHT SISTER SAILOR'S BAIT SALES LADY SCARLET SISTER SHE SAILS SISTER SISTER OF MERCY SLOOP OF WAR SLUT SPEEDY SISTER SPORTING GIRL STEM SIREN STREETWALKER STRUMPET TAIL TART TNRILL DAME TOFFER TRICKING BROAD TUMBLE VENT RENTER VICE SISTER WHORE WINDOW TAPPER WOMAN ABOUT TOWN WORKING GIRL ZOOK Avoid describing pimps with any of the following: APRON SQUIRE ASS PEDDLER BROTHER OF THE GUSSET BUTTON BROKER CRACK SALESMAN FISHMONGER FLESH PEDDLER GORILLA HONEY MAN HUSTLER ICEBERG SLIM MACK MAN MISSIONARY PANDERER PETTICOAT MERCHANT PONCE PROCURER PROSSER RUNNER SKIRT MAN STABLE BOSS TOUTE WHISKIN If masturbation (male) comes up, don’t use the following: BACKSTROKE ROULETTE BASH THE CANDLE BEAT OFF BEAT THE BISHOP BEAT THE DUMMY BEAT THE MEAT BEAT THE STICK BLEED THE WEED BLOW YOUR LOAD BLUDGEON THE BEEFSTEAK BOP THE BALONEY BOX THE JESUIT BUFF THE BANANA BURP THE WORM BUTTER THE CORN CHOKE THE CHICKEN CHOKE THE SHERIFF AND WAIT FOR THE POSSE TO COME CLEAN YOUR RIFLE CRANK THE SHANK CROWN THE KING CUFF THE CARROT DIDDLE DRAIN THE MONSTER FIST FUCK FIST YOUR MISTER FIVE AGAINST ONE FLOG THE DOG FLOG THE HOG FLOG YOUR DONG FLUTE SOLO FONDLE THE FIG GALLOP THE ANTELOPE GIVE IT A TUG GREASE THE PIPE HACK THE HOG HAND JOB HAND WORK HAVE IT OFF HITCHHIKE UNDER THE BIG TOP HUMP YOUR HOSE JACKHAMMER JACK OFF JAZZ YOURSELF JERK OFF JERK THE GHERKIN LOPE THE MULE MAKE THE BALD MAN PUKE MANIPULATE THE MANGO MANUAL OVERRIDE MILK THE LIZARD MOUNT A CORPORAL AND FOUR NERK YOUR THROBBER OIL THE GLOVE ONAN'S OLYMPICS ONE-MAN SHOW PACK YOUR PALM PADDLE THE PICKLE PAINT THE PICKLE PAINT THE CEILING PLEASE YOUR PISSER PLUNK YOUR TWANGER POCKET PINBALL POCKET POOL POLISH THE ROCKET POLISH THE SWORD POUND OFF POUND YOUR FLOUNDER POUND YOUR PUD PULL OFF PULL THE POLE PULL THE POPE PULL THE PUDDING PULL YOUR PRICK PULL YOUR TAFFY PUMP THE PYTHON RAM THE HAM RIDE THE GREAT WHITE KNUCKLER ROPE THE PONY RUB OFF SHAG SHINE YOUR POLE SHOOI IN' PUTTY AT THE MOON SLAKIN' THE BACON SLAMMIN' THE SALMON SLAM THE HAMMER SLAM THE SPAM SLAPPIN' PAPPY SLAPPING THE CLOWN SLING THE JELLY SNAP THE MONKEY SNAP THE RUBBER SNAP THE WHIP SOLDIER'S JOY SPANK THE FRANK SPANK THE SALAMI SQUEEZE THE LEMON STROKING IT STROKE OFF STROKE THE DOG STROKE YOUR POKER TAKE YOURSELF IN HAND TEASE THE WEENIE TENDERIZE THE MEAT THE FIVE-KNUCKLE SHUFFLE THUMP THE PUMP TICKLE YOUR PICKLE TOSS OFF TWEAK YOUR TWINKIE VARNISH THE FLAGPOLE VISITING ROSIE PALM AND HER FIVE DAUGHTERS WALK THE DOG WANK WAX THE CARROT WAX THE DOLPHIN WHACK OFF WHIP OFF WHIP THE DUMMY WHIP THE WIRE WHIP YOUR DRIPPER WHIZUN'JIZZUM WONK YOUR CONKER WORK OFF WRESTLE THE EEL WRING OUT YOUR ROPE YANG YOUR WANG YANK OFF YANK THE CRANK YANK THE PLANK YANK THE YAM YANK YOUR STRAP When speaking of female masturbation, please avoid: BEAT THE BEAVER CLAP YOUR CLIT COOKIN' CUCUMBERS FINGER FINGER FUCK FINGER JOB GETTIN'IT WET GREASIN' THE GASH HAND TRIP HIDE THE HOT DOG HIT THE SLIT HOSE YOUR HOLE JUICE YOUR SLUICE LET THE BEAVER SWIM MAKIN' SOME SOUP PET THE POODLE SHE-BOP SLAM THE CLAM TICKLE THE TACO TWO-FINGER TANGO When referencing anal intercourse please don’t say: ASS-FUCK BACK DOOR BAKE POTATOES BEND SOME HAM BALONEY COLONIC BOSCO BOULEVARD BROWN BROWN HOLE BUGGER BUM FUCK BUTT-BANG BUTT-FUCK CHOCOLATE SPEEDWAY CORNHOLE DIG A DITCHPOP IT IN THE TOASTER DIP IN THE FUDGE POT DO A BROWN DOT THE "I" FISH FOR BROWN TROUT FLUFF THE DUFF GET SOME MUD FOR THE DUCK GOIN' DOWN THE DIRT ROAD GREEKING HERSHEY HIGHWAY HIT SOMEONE IN THE SEAT KIESTER STAB KNEELING AT THE ALTAR MAKING POUNDCAKE MUSTARD ROAD OVER THE BRIDGE TO PLIMPTON PACKING FUDGE PAINT THE BUCKET POWDER SOMEONE'S CHEEKS PUSHIN' SHIT UPHILL RAM JOB REAM RECTIFY RIDE THE DECK SADDLE UP SHIT-FUCK SPLIT SOME BUNS STIR FUDGE THIRD WAY THREAD SOMEBODY TOM-FUCK When speaking of any part of the posterior, avoid the following: ARSE ASS ASSHOLE BACK END BACK DOOR BACK DOOR TRUMPET BACKSIDE BEHIND BIM BLIND EYE BLOT BOGEY BOODY BOOTY BOSCO BOULEVARD BOTTOM BROWN BUCKET BROWNIE BUCKET BUM BUNG HOLE BUNS BUTT CABOOSE CAN CHEEKS CHOCOLATE SPEEDWAY CHUFF CLUNKS CORYBUNGUS CULO DERRIERE DIRT ROAD DOT DOUBLE JUGGS DUFF DUMMOCK DUSTER FANNY FARTING CLAPPER FEAK FUD FUDGE TUNNEL GIGI GROMMET HERSHEY HIGHWAY HEARTS HEINIE HIND HOLE HUNKERS KEISTER KHYBER PASS LAST PART OVER THE FENCE LATTER END LITTLE BROWN EYEBALL LUDS MOON NATES NORTH POLE ORBS POOP CHUTE PORT HOLE PRATS PUCKER HOLE REAR REAR END RESTER RING RIP ROUND EYE RUMP SCUT SEAT SEWER SHIT CHUTE SLATS TAIL TAN TRACK TOBY TOCHES TUSH UNDER SIDE WINDMILL WINDWARD PASSAGE When talking about a toilet, give it some respect. Please refrain from: ALTAR ROOM BATH BATHROOM BIFFY BOG CHAMBER OF COMMERCE CLOSET OF DECENCY COMFORT STATION FACILITIES GENTLEMEN'S ROOM GENTS' ROOM INDOOR PLUMBING JAKE JOHN LADIES' ROOM LAV LEAKERY LIBRARY LITTLE BOYS' ROOM LITTLE GIRLS' ROOM LOO MARBLE PALACE MEN'S ROOM MRS. JONES'S PLACE OLD SOLDIERS' HOME PISSER PLUMBING POT POWDER ROOM PUBLIC CONVENIENCE REST ROOM SANDBOX SHIT HOUSE SHITTER SHOT TOWER TEAROOM TWILIGHT USED BEER DEPARTMENT WASHROOM WATER CLOSET WHERE THE QUEEN GOES ON FOOT WHIZ STAND WIZZER That’s all I can think of for now. I appeciate you taking the time to search all of your picture captions and comments to remove these terms. CREDIT FOR THIS LIST GOES TO GEORGE CARLIN.
