mmk, this network is 100% owned bah your daddy, Hackah Jak... heh, lets see how many laws we can break tonight... mmk... I thoguht I would hook you all up with a list of stupid ass laws that I found... unf unf unf, daym it, i need more beer... grrr, can you beleave anal sex is not legal in some places... WTF!@$!#%!@#$ daym it... Extra props to Devil-C, PA777, Hackah KP, c4ndyman, acidk|own, and of course Seductres!!!

Alabama

 
  • It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle.
  • Dominoes may not be played on Sunday.
  • It is illegal to wear a fake moustache that causes laughter in church.
  • Putting salt on a railraod track may be punishable by death.
  • Boogers may not be flicked into the wind.
  • Unlawful bear exploitation; penalties.(a) A person commits the offense of unlawful bear exploitation if he or she knowingly does any one of the following: (1) Promotes, engages in, or is employed at a bear wrestling match. (2) Receives money for the admission of another person to a place kept for bear wrestling. (3) Sells, purchases, possesses, or trains a bear for bear wrestling. (4) For purposes of exploitation, subjects a bear to surgical alteration in any form, including, but not limited to, declawing, tooth removal, and severing tendons. (b) Unlawful bear exploitation is a Class B felony and is punishable as provided by law. -Section 13A-12-5 (Passed in 1996)
  • It is legal to drive the wrong way down a one-way street if you have a lantern attached to the front of your automobile. [See a cartoon! Small (7k) / Medium (38k) / Large (83k)]
  • You must have windshield wipers on your car.
  • You may not have an ice cream cone in your back pocket at any time.
  • Masks may not be worn in public.
  • Men may not spit in front of the opposite sex.
  • You may not drive barefooted.
  • It is illegal to maim oneself to escape duty.
  • It is illegal to impersonate a person of the clergy.
 
 

Anniston

  • You may not wear blue jeans down Noble Street.

Jasper

  • It is illegal for a husband to beat his wife with a stick larger in diameter than his thumb.

Lee County

  • It is illegal to sell peanuts in Lee County after sundown on Wednesday.

Mobile

  • It is unlawful to howl at ladies inside the city limits.
  • It is unlawful to wear women's pumps with sharp, high heels.

Montgomery

  • It is considered an offense to open an umbrella on a street, for fear of it spooking horses. (Repealed)


Alaska
 
  • Moose may not be viewed from an airplane.

  • While it is legal to shoot bears, waking a sleeping bear for the purpose of taking a photograph is prohibited.

  • It is the state policy that emergencies are held to a minimum and are rarely found to exist. -Sec. 44.62.270. State policy.

  • It is considered an offense to push a live moose out of a moving airplane.

 

Fairbanks

  • It is considered an offense to feed alcoholic beverages to a moose.


Arizona
 
  • Hunting camels is prohibited.
  • Any misdemeanor committed while wearing a red mask is considered a felony. This goes back in the days of the Wild West.
  • There is a possible 25 years in prison for cutting down a cactus. [See a cartoon! Small (10k) / Medium (36k) / Large (105k)]
  • Donkeys cannot sleep in bathtubs.
  • When being attacked by a criminal or burglar, you may only protect yourself with the same weapon that the other person posseses.
  • It is unlawful to refuse a person a glass of water.
  • You may not have more than two dildos in a house.
 
 

Glendale

  • Cars may not be driven in reverse.

Globe

  • Cards may not be played in the street with a Native American.

Hayden

  • If you bother the cottontails or bullfrogs, you will be fined.

Maricopa County

  • No more than six girls may live in any house.

Mesa

  • It is illegal to smoke cigarettes within 15 feet of a public place unless you have a Class 12 liqueur license.

Mohave County

  • A decree declares that anyone caught stealing soap must wash himself with it until it is all used up.

Nogales

  • An ordinance prohibits the wearing of suspenders.

Prescott

  • No one is permitted to ride their horse up the stairs of the county court house.

Tucson

  • Women may not wear pants.

Tombstone

  • It is illegal for men and women over the age of 18 to have less than one missing tooth visible when smiling.

Arkansas
 

 

  • The Arkansas River can rise no higher than to the Main Street bridge in Little Rock.
  • Arkansas must be pronounced "Arkansaw"
  • A law provides that school teachers who bob their hair will not get a raise.
  • A man can legally beat his wife, but not more than once a month.
  • Oral sex is considered to be sodomy.
  • Alligators may not be kept in bathtubs.
  • No person shall be permitted under any pretext whatever, to come nearer then fifty feet of any door of window of any polling room, from the opening of the polls until the certification of the returns. -Arkansas Law, section 4761
 
  Fayetteville
  • It is illegal to kill "any living creature".
Little Rock
  • Dogs may not bark after 6 PM.
  • Flirtation between men and women on the streets of Little Rock may result in a 30-day jail term.
  • It is unlawful to walk one's cow down Main Street after 1:00 PM on Sunday.
  • No person shall sound the horn on a vechicle at any place where cold drinks or sandwiches are served after 9:00 P.M. -Little Rock City Code Sec. 18-54

California

 
  • Sunshine is guaranteed to the masses.
  • Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship. [See a cartoon! Small (14k) / Medium (28k) / Large (16k)]
  • Bathhouses are against the law.
  • It is a misdemeanor to shoot at any kind of game from a moving vehicle, unless the target is a whale.
  • Women may not drive in a house coat.
  • No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour.
  • Many animals are illegal to own as pets, including snails, sloths, and elephants.
  • In an animal shelter, lizards and snakes are treated under the same guidelines as cats and dogs.
  Arcadia
  • Peacocks have the right of way to cross any street, including driveways.
Alhambra
  • You cannot leave your car on the street overnight without the proper permit.
Baldwin Park
  • Nobody is allowed to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool.
Belvedere
  • City Council order reads: "No dog shall be in a public place without its master on a leash."
Blythe
  • You are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own at least two cows.
Burlingame
  • It is illegal to spit, except on baseball diamonds.
Carmel
  • Ice cream may not be eaten while standing on the sidewalk. (Repealed when Clint Eastwood was mayor)
  • Women may not wear high heels while in the city limits.
Chico
  • Detonating a nuclear device within the city limits results in a $500 fine.
Downey
  • It is illegal to wash your car in the street. (Passed 1995).
Hollywood
  • It is illegal to drive more than two thousand sheep down Hollywood Boulevard at one time.
Lafayette
  • You are forbidden to spit on the ground within 5 feet of another person.

Lodi

 

  • It is illegal to own or sell "Silly String".

 

Lompoc
  • It is illegal to posses, own or raise roosters. This is considered disturbing the peace.
Long Beach
  • Cars are the only item allowed in a garage.
  • It is illegal to curse on a mini-golf course.
Los Angeles
  • It is illegal for a man to beat his wife with a strap wider than 2 inches without her consent.
  • You cannot bathe two babies in the same tub at the same time.
  • You may not hunt moths under a street light.
  • It is illegal to cry on the witness stand.
  • Toads may not be licked.
  • It is a crime for dogs to mate within 500 yards of a church.  Breaking this law is punishable by a fine of $500 and/or six months in prison.
  • Zoot suits are prohibited.
Ontario
  • Roosters may not crow in the city limits.
Pacific Grove
  • Molesting butterflies can result in a $500 fine.
Palm Springs
  • It is illegal to walk a camel down Palm Canyon Drive between the hours of four and six PM.
Pasadena
  • It is illegal for a secretary to be alone in a room with her boss.
Prunedale
  • Two bathtubs may not be installed in the same house.
Redlands
  • Motor vehicles may not drive on city streets unless a man with a lantern is wallking ahead of it.
Riverside
  • One may not carry a lunch down the street between 11 and 1 o'clock.
San Diego
  • It is illegal to shoot jackrabbits from the back of a streetcar.
  • The owners of houses with Christmas lights on them past February second may be fined up to $250.
San Francisco
  • Prohibits elephants from strolling down Market Street unless they are on a leash.
  • It is illegal to wipe one's car with used underwear.
  • Persons classified as "ugly" may not walk down any street.
  • It is illegal to pile horse manure more than six feet high on a street corner.
  • Giving or receiving oral sex is prohibited.
San Jose
  • It is illegal to have more than two cats or dogs. -Ord. 7.08.595
Santa Monica
  • You may not play percussion instruments on the beach.
Temecula
  • Ducks have the right of way to cross Rancho California St. at all times.

Colorado
 
 
  • Car dealers may not show cars on a Sunday.
  • It is illegal for liquor stores to sell food or grocery stores to sell any alcohol except beer that is at most 3.2% alcohol.
  • No liquor may be sold on Sundays or election days. (Repealed)
  • It is illegal to ride a horse while under the influence.
  • Tags may be ripped off of pillows and mattresses.
 
 

Colorado Springs

 

  • It is permissable to wear a holstered six-gun within city limits, except on Sunday, Election Day, or holidays.

 

Crippe Creek

  • It is illegal to bring your horse or pack mule above the ground floor of any building.

 

Denver

  • The dog catcher must notify dogs of impounding by posting, for three consecutive days, a notice on a tree in the city park and along a public road running through said park.
  • It is unlawful to lend your vacuum cleaner to your next-door neighbor.
  • It is illegal to mistreat rats in Denver, Colorado.
  • You may not drive a black car on Sundays.
Durango
  • It is illegal to go in public dressed in clothes "unbecoming" on one's sex.
Logan County
  • It is illegal for a man to kiss a woman while she is asleep.
Pueblo
  • It is illegal to let a dandelion grow within the city limits.
Sterling
  • Cats may not run loose without having been fit with a taillight.

Connecticut
 
 
  • You can be stopped by the police for biking over 65 miles per hour.

  • In order for a pickle to officially be considered a pickle, it must bounce.

  • It is illegal to dispose of used razor blades.

  • You cannot buy any alcohol after 8pm or on Sundays.

  • The marriage of imbeciles and feeble-minded persons is prohibited. (Repealed)
  • It is illegal to discharge a firearm from a public highway.
  • No one may use a white cane, unless they are blind.
 
 

Devon

  • It is unlawful to walk backwards after sunset.

Guilford

  • Only white Christmas lights are allowed for display.

Hartford

  • You aren't allowed to cross a street while walking on your hands.

  • You may not educate dogs.

  • It is illegal for a man to kiss his wife on Sunday.

New Britain

  • It is illegal for fire trucks to exceed 25mph, even when going to a fire.

Southington

  • Silly string is banned.

Waterbury

  • It is illegal for any beautician to hum, whistle, or sing while working on a customer.


Delaware
 
 
  • It is illegal to fly over any body of water, unless one is carrying sufficient supplies of food and drink.

 
 

Lewes

  • It is illegal to wear pants that are "firm fitting" around the waist.

  • Getting married on a dare is grounds for an annulment.


Florida
 
  • Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.
  • A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
  • If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.
  • It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
  • Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
  • Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.
  • It is illegal to skateboard without a license.
  • When having sex, only the missionary position is legal.
  • You may not fart in a public place after 6 P.M. on Thursdays.
  • It is considered an offense to shower naked.
  • You are not allowed to break more than three dishes per day, or chip the edges of more than four cups and/or saucers.
  • Oral sex is illegal.
  • You may not kiss your wife's breasts.
  • Penalty for horse theft is death by hanging.
  • It is illegal to block any traveled wagon road.
 
  Big Pine Key
  • It is illegal to molest a Key deer. If caught one will be fined or will have to go to jail.
Cape Coral
  • It is against the city ordinance to hang your clothes outside on a clothesline.
  • It it illegal to park a pick-up truck in your driveway or in front of your house on the street.  This law is limited to only those who do not own the house. (Repealed 2000)
Daytona Beach
  • The molestation of trash cans is banned.
  • Sec. 10-56. While intoxicated, under influence of narcotics, prohibited. It shall be unlawful for any person to swim or bathe in that portion of the Atlantic Ocean within the corporate limits of the city when under the influence of intoxicating liquor or narcotic drugs to the extent that his or her normal faculties are impaired. (Code 1955, § 28-64)
  • Sec. 22-44. Storage, depositing prohibited. It shall be unlawful for any person, either as owner, occupant, lessee, agent, tenant, or otherwise, to store or deposit, or cause or permit to be stored or deposited, any abandoned, junked or discarded motor vehicle or motor vehicles upon any public or private property within the city. (Code 1955, § 20-11)
  • Sec. 18-2. Weeds, trash, etc., as a public nuisance; removal by property owner or by city at owner's expense; notice and hearing; lien for expenses. (a) The existence of weeds, trash, undergrowth, brush, filth, garbage or other refuse on any lot, tract or parcel of land within the city which has caused the property to become, or which may reasonably cause the property to become infested, or inhabited by rodents, vermin or wild animals, or may furnish a breeding place for mosquitoes or threatens the public health, safety or welfare, or may reasonably cause disease or adversely affects and impairs the economic welfare of the adjacent property, is declared to constitute a public nuisance and is hereby prohibited.
Hialeah
  • Ambling and strolling is a misdemeanor.
Jupiter Inlet Colony Inlet
  • Sec. 3-1. Bird sanctuary declared. (a) It is hereby declared that all territory embraced within the corporate limits of the municipality shall be a bird sanctuary. (b) It shall be unlawful for any person within the municipality to shoot, trap or in any manner kill, wound or maim any bird of any kind, or at any time to throw at any birds of any kind any missile with slingshots or any other weapon, or to disturb their eggs or their young or their nests. (Ord. No. 8-59, §§ 1, 2, 8-10-59)
Key West
  • Chickens are considered a 'protected species'.
Miami
  • It is illegal for men to be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
  • Sec. 8-3. Bell or other warning device. No person shall operate a bicycle unless it is equipped with a bell or device capable of giving a signal audible for a distance of at least 100 feet, but no bicycle shall be equipped with, nor shall any person use upon a bicycle, any siren or whistle. (Code 1967, § 8-3; Code 1980, § 8-3)
Pensacola
  • Citizens may not be caught downtown without at least 10 dollars on their person.
  • It is illegal to roll a barrel on any street, fines go up according to the contents of the barrel.
  • A women can be fined (only after death), for being electrocuted in a bath-tub because of using self-beautification utensils.

Pinecrest

  • In order to operate a burglar alarm, a permit must be obtained. Sec. 12-23. Registration required; application; transferability; false statements. (a)All persons must complete and submit to the village an emergency contact registration form for their alarm if they operate or cause to be operated an alarm system in the village. A separate registration is required for each alarm system. Upon receipt of a completed registration form, the police department shall issue a numbered alarm sticker to the applicant to facilitate retrieval of registration information. (Ord. No. 97-17, § 1, 10-14-97)

Sanford

  • Stage nudity is banned, with the exception of "bona fide" theatrical performances. Violating this ordinance results in a $100 fine.

Sarasota

  • If you hit a pedestrian you are fined $78.00.
  • You may not catch crabs.

Tampa Bay

  • It is illegal to eat cottage cheese on Sunday after 6:00 P.M.

Georgia
 
 
  • It is illegal to use profanity in front of a dead body which lies in a funeral home or in a coroners office.
  • You have the right to commit simple battery if provoked by "fighting" words.
  • Members of the state assembly cannot be ticketed for speeding while the state assembly is in session.
  • Donkeys may not be kept in bathtubs.
  • Signs are required to be written in English.
  • No one may carry an ice cream cone in their back pocket if it is Sunday.
 
  Acworth
  • All citizens must own a rake.
Atlanta
  • Against the law to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or street lamp.
  • One man may not be on another man's back.
Columbus
  • Can't cut off a chicken's head on Sunday.
  • It is illegal to carry a chicken by it's feet down Broadway on Sunday.
Gainesville
  • Chicken must be eaten with the hands.
Jonesboro
  • It is illegal to say "Oh, Boy"
Kennesaw
  • Every head of household must possess a firearm of some kind.
Marietta
  • Though it is illegal to spit from a car or bus, citizens may spit from a truck.
St. Mary's
  • No spitting on the sidewalk is permitted after dark.
Quitman
  • It is illegal for a chicken to cross the road.
  • Cars are not to drive on sidewalks.

Hawaii
 
 
  • All residents may be fined as a result of not owning a boat.
  • Coins are not allowed to be placed in one's ears.
 
  Honolulu
  • Within the limits of any public park, it is unlawful to annoy any bird.  (SEC. 10-1.2)

Idaho
 
 
  • Illegal for a man to give his sweetheart a box of candy weighing less than fifty pounds.
  • You may not fish on a camel's back.
  • Riding a merry-go-round on Sundays is considered a crime.
 
  Boise
  • Residents may not fish from a giraffe's back.
Coeur d' Alene
  • If a police officer approaches a vehicle and suspects that the occupants are engaging in sex, he must either honk, or flash his lights and wait for three minutes before approaching the car.
Pocatello
  • A law passed in 1912 provided that "The carrying of concealed weapons is forbidden, unless some are exhibited to public view."
  • A person may not be seen in public without a smile on their face.

Illinois
 
 
  • You may be arrested for vagrancy if you do not have at least one dollar bill on your person.
  • You may be convicted of a Class 4 felony offense, punishable by up to three years in state prison, for the crime of  "eavesdropping" on your own conversation. -720 ILCS 5/14-2.
  • You must contact the police before entering the city in an automobile.
  • The English language is not to be spoken.
 
  Chicago
  • Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire.
  • It is illegal to give a dog whiskey.
  • Kites may not be flown within the city limits.
  • Spitting is forbidden
  • In the Pullman area, it is illegal to drink beer out of a bucket while sitting on the curb.
  • It is forbidden to fish while sitting on a giraffe's neck.
  • It is legal to protest naked in front of city hall as long as you are under seventeen years of age and have legal permits.
Champaign
  • One may not pee in his neighbor's mouth.
Cicero
  • Humming on public streets is prohibited on Sundays.
Crete
  • It is considered an offense to attempt to have sex with one's dog.
  • Cars may not be driven through the town.
Des Plaines
  • Wheelbarrows with For-Sale signs may not be chained to trees.
Eureka
  • A man with a moustache may not kiss a woman.
Evanston
  • Bowling is forbidden.
  • It is illegal to go trick-or-treating on Halloween.
  • It is unlawful to change clothes in an automobile with the curtains drawn, except in case of fire.
Freeport
  • It is illegal to expectorate from any second-story window.
Galesburg
  • There is a $1,000 dollar fine for beating rats with baseball bats.
Homer
  • It is against the law to use a slingshot unless your are a law enforcement officer.
Joliet
  • Town fathers, reflecting the pet peeve of hearing their town's name mispronounced 'Jolly-ETTE' when all local folk know it's pronounced 'Joe-lee-ETTE', made pronouncing it Jolly-ette a misdemeanor, punishable by a $5 fine.
Kenilworth
  • A rooster must step back three hundred feet from any residence if he wishes to crow. Hens that wish to cackle must step two hundred feet back from any residence.
Kirkland
  • Bees are not allowed to fly over the village or through any of Kriland's streets.
Moline
  • Ice skating at the Riverside pond during the months of June and August is prohibited.
  • There is a ban on unnecessary repetitive driving on 23rd Avenue.
Morton Grove
  • You may not own a handgun
Normal
  • It is against the law to make faces at dogs.
Orland Prak
  • No pool tables are allowed in a public establishment, because it supports gambling.
Ottawa
  • Spitting on the sidewalk is a criminal offense.
Park Ridge
  • Trucks may only park inside closed garages.
Peoria
  • Basketball hoops may not be instaled on a driveway.
Zion
  • It is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, or any other domesticated animals.

Indiana
 
 
  • Baths may not be taken between the months of October and March.
  • It is illegal to sell cars on Sunday.
  • Oral sex is illegal.
  • A man over the age of 18 may be arrested for statutory rape if the passenger in his car is not wearing her socks and shoes, and is under the age of 17.
  • It is against the law to pass a horse on the street.
  • It is illegal for a liquor store to sell cold soft drinks.
  • Liquor stores may not sell milk.
  • Grocery stores may not sell any type of cold liquor.
  • One man may not back into a parking spot becasue it prevents police officers from seeing the license plate.
  • Smoking in the state legislature building is banned, except when the legislature is in session.
  • Check forgery can be punished with public flogging up to 100 stripes.
  • Pedestrians crossing the highway at night are prohibited from wearing tail lights.
  • No one may catch a fish with his bare hands.
  • Men are prohibited from standing in a bar.
  • You are not allowed to carry a cocktail from the bar to a table. The waiter or waitress has to do it.
  • Drinks on the house are illegal.
  • Drinking from your own bottle in a bar can lead to your arrest.
  • You are required to pour your drink into a glass.
  • "Spiteful Gossip" and "talking behind a person's back" are illegal.
  • State government officials who engage in private duels can be dismissed from their post.
  • All males 18 to 50 years old must work six days a year on public roads.
  • Mustaches are illegal if the bearer has a tendency to habitually kiss other humans.
  • Hotel sheets must be exactly 99 inches long and 81 inches wide.
  • If any person has a puppet show, wire dancing or tumbling act in the state of Indiana and receives money for it, they will be fined $3 under the Act to Prevent Certain Immoral Practices.
  • Anyone 14 or older who profanely curses, damns or swears by the name of God, Jesus Christ or the Holy Ghost, shall be fined one to three dollars for each offense, with a maximum fine of ten dollars per day.
  • A three dollar fine per pack will be imposed on anyone playing cards in Indiana under the Act for the Prevention of Gaming.
  • The value of Pi is 4, and not 3.1415. (Repealed)
  • It is illegal for a man to be sexually aroused in public.
 
  Auburn
  • It is illegal to bike, roller-skate, skateboard, or inline skate in a commercially zoned area. For these offesnses, there is a fine of no more than $5 or the impounding of one's bicycle for a period not to exceed 30 days.
Beech Grove
  • It is forbidden to eat watermelon in the park.
Evansville
  • While driving on Main Street you may not have your lights on.
Fort Wayne
  • You may not sell or play on a radio broadcast, the record "It`s In the Book".
Gary
  • Within four hours of eating garlic, a person may not enter a movie house, theater, or ride a public streetcar.
South Bend
  • It is illegal to make a monkey smoke a cigarette.
Terre Haute
  • No one may spit on the sidewalk.

Iowa
 
 
  • Kisses may last for no more than five minutes.
  • One-armed piano players must perform for free.
  • A man with a moustache may never kiss a woman in public.
  • It is a violation of the law to sell or distribute drugs or narcotics without having first obtained the appropriate Iowa drug tax stamp.
 
  Dubuque
  • Any hotel in the city limits must have a water bucket and a hitching post in front of the building.
Indianola
  • The "Ice Cream Man" and his truck are banned.
Fort Madison
  • The fire department is required to practice fire fighting for fifteen minutes before attending a fire.
Marshalltown
  • Horses are forbidden to eat fire hydrants
Ottumwa
  • Within the city limits, a man may not wink at any woman he does not know.

Kansas
 
 
  • Rabbits may not be shot from motorboats.
  • Pedestrians crossing the highways at night must wear tail lights.
  • No one may catch fish with his bare hands.
  • The state game rule prohibits the use of mules to hunt ducks.
  • If two trains meet on the same track, neither shall proceed until the other has passed.
 
  Lawrence
  • All cars entering the city limits must first sound their horn to warn the horses of their arrival.
  • No one may wear a bee in their hat.
Russell
  • Musical car horns are banned
Salina
  • It is against the law to leave your car running unattended.
Topeka
  • The installation of bathtubs is prohibited.
Wichita
  • Before proceeding through the interesection of Douglas and Broadway, a motorist is required to get out of their vehice and fire three shot gun rounds into the air.
  • Any person caught using or carrying bean snappers or the like shall upon conviction, be fined. -City ordinance 349 of Wichita, Kansas.

Kentucky
 
 
  • Any person who appears on any highway, or upon the street of any city that has no police protection, when clothed only in ordinary bathing garb, shall be fined no less than five dollars nor more than twenty-five dollars." - KRS 436.140 (Passed in 1922; Repealed in 1974)
  • No person shall sell, exchange, offer to sell or exchange, display or possess living baby chicks, ducklings, or other fowl or rabbits which have been dyed or colored; nor dye or color any baby chicks, ducklings or other fowl or rabbits; nor sell, exchange, offer to sell or exchange or to give away baby chicks, ducklings or other fowl or rabbits, under two months of age in any quantity less than six, except that any rabbit weighing three pounds or more may be sold at an age of six weeks. Any person who violates this section shall be fined not less than $100 nor more than $500. -KRS 436.600 (Passed 1966 Ky. Acts ch. 215, sec. 5.)
  • No person owning or controlling a billiard or pool table shall permit, for compensation or reward, any minor under eighteen (18) years of age to play any game on the table, unless such minor shall have first displayed an identification card containing his name, age, photograph, and the signature of his parents or guardian. The minor shall keep such identification card on his person, and it shall be subject to inspection at any time by any peace officer. The person owning or controlling such billiard or pool table shall keep and maintain a registration book in which each minor shall sign. The person owning or controlling such billiard or pool table shall supply a blank identification card to each parent or guardian who makes request for same. Any person who violates this section shall be fined not less than ten ($10) nor more than one hundred dollars ($100) for each offense. -KRS 436.320 (Passed 1893; Amended in 1954, Ky. Acts ch. 232, sec. 1)
  • Any person who displays, handles or uses any kind of reptile in connection withany religious service or gathering shall be fined not less than fifty dollars ($50) nor more than one hundred dollars ($100). -KRS 437.060 (Passed 1942, from Ky. Stat. sec. 1267a-1.).
  • It is illegal to fish with a bow and arrow in Kentucky.
  • It's illegal to fish in the Ohio River in Kentucky without an Indiana Fishing License.
  • All bees entering Kentucky shall be accompanied by certificates of health, stating that the
    apiary from which the bees came was free from contagious or infectious disease. -KRS 252.130 (Passed in 1922; Repealed in 1948)
 
  Lexington
  • It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.
  • By law, anyone who has been drinking is "sober" until he or she "cannot hold onto the ground."
Owensboro
  • A woman may not buy a hat without her husband's permission.
  • One may not receive anal sex.

Louisana
 
 
  • It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller with a water pistol.
  • Biting someone with your natural teeth is "simple assault," while biting someone with your false teeth is "aggravated assault."
  • It is illegal to gargle in public places.
 
  New Orleans
  • You may not tie an alligator to a fire hydrant.
  • It illegal for a woman to drive a car unless her husband is waving a flag in front of it.

Maine
 
 
  • After January 14th you will be charged a fine for having your Christmas decorations still up.
  • You may not step out of a plane in flight.
  • Shotguns are required to be taken to church in the event of a Native American attack.
 
  Augusta
  • To stroll down the street playing a violin is against the law.
Portland
  • Shoelaces must be tied while walking down the street.

Maryland
 
 
  • Oral sex can not be given or received anywhere.
  • Thistles may not grow in one's yard.
 
  Baltimore
  • It's illegal to throw bales of hay from a second-story window within the city limits.
  • It's illegal to take a lion to the movies.
  • It is a park rule violation to be in a public park with a sleeveless shirt. $10 fine. This would include joggers that go shirtless. (1898)
  • No person who is a "tramp" or "vagrant" shall loiter in any park at any time. They define tramp as a person who roves for begging purposes and a vagrant as an idle person who is able-bodied living without labor. It's a $50 fine. I guess the tramp would have to beg for the money to pay the fine. -Park Rule 6
  • It is a violation of city code to sell chicks or ducklings to a minor within 1 week of the Easter holiday.
Baltimore City
  • Though you may spit on a city roadway, spitting on city sidewalks is prohibited.
  • You may not curse inside the city limits.
Columbia
  • You can not have a antenna exposed outside of your house yet you can have a 25' satellite dish.
  • Though clotheslines are banned, clothes may be draped over a fence.
Ocean City
  • A law from the early 1900's prohibits men from going topless on the Boardwalk. (Repealed)
  • Eating while swimming in the ocean is prohibited.

Massachusetts
 
 
  • At a wake, mourners may eat no more than three sandwiches.
  • Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked.
  • An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.
  • Taxi drivers are prohibited from making love in the front seat of their taxi during their shifts.
  • All men must carry a rifle to church on Sunday. (Repealed)
  • Hunting on Sundays is prohibited.
  • It is illegal to go to bed without first having a full bath.
  • A woman can not be on top in sexual activities.
  • No gorilla is allowed in the back seat of any car.
  • Tattooing and body piercing is illegal.
  • Children may smoke, but they may not purchase cigarettes.
  • Tomatoes may not be used in the production of clam chowder.
  • Quakers and witches are banned.
  • Bullets may not be used as currency.
  • Massachusetts liquor stores can only open on Sundays if they are in Berkshire, Essex, Franklin, Middlesex or Worcester counties and are within 10 miles of the Vermont or New Hampshire borders.
  • Alcoholic drink specials are illegal.
  • Affiliation with the Communist party is illegal.
  • Public boxing matches are outlawed.
  • It is unlawful to injure a football goal post, doing so is punishable by a $200 fine
  • Defacing a milk carton is punishable by a $10 fine.
  • It is illegal to frighten a pigeon.
 
  Boston
  • It is illegal to play the fiddle.
  • Two people may not kiss in front of a church.
  • No more than two baths may be taken within the confines of the city.
  • Anyone may let their sheep and cows graze in the public gardens/commons at any time except Sundays.
  • It is illegal to eat peanuts in church.
  • An old law prohibits the taking of baths on Sunday.
  • Duels to the death permitted on the common on Sundays provided that the Governor is present.
  • Women may not wear heels over 3 inches in length while on the common.
  • No one may take a bath without a prescription.
  • It is illegal for any citizen to own more than three dogs.
Burlington
  • You may not walk around with a "drink".
Hingham
  • You may not have colored lights on your house if it can be seen from Main Street.  Only white lights may be visible.
  • If you live on Main Street and want to paint your house, the colors must be approved by the historical society.
Hopkinton
  • Though horses and cows are allowed on the common, dogs are prohibited.
Longmeadow
  • It is illegal for two men to carry a bathtub across the town green.
Marlboro
  • It is illegal to buy, sell or possess a squirt gun.
  • Silly string is illegal in the city limits.
  • One may not detonate a nuclear device in the city.
  • It is illegal for any citizen to own more than two dogs.
Milford
  • Peeping in the windows of automobiles is forbidden.
Newton
  • All families must be given a hog from the town's mayor.
North Andover
  • An ordinance prohibits the use of space guns.
Woburn
  • In bars, it is actually illegal to "walk around" with a beer in your hand. (Repealed)

Michigan
 
 
  • A woman isn't allowed to cut her own hair without her husband's permission.
  • There is a 10 cent bounty for each rat's head brought into a town office.
  • It is legal for a robber to file a law suit, if he or she got hurt in your house.
  • You may not swear in front of women and children in the state of Michigan.
  • Any person over the age of 12 may have a license for a handgun as long as he/she has not been convicted of a felony.
 
  Clawson
  • There is a law that makes it legal for a farmer to sleep with his pigs, cows, horses, goats, and chickens.
Detroit
  • Couples are banned from making love in an automobile unless the act takes place while the vehicle is parked on the couple's own property.
  • Willfully destroying your old radio is prohibited.
  • It is illegal for a man to scowl at his wife on Sunday.
  • Alligators may not be tied to fire hydrants.
  • It is illegal to let your pig run free in Detroit unless it has a ring in its nose. According to history and animal husbandry, it prevents them from "rooting" in the ground for their food.
Grand Haven
  • No person shall throw an abandoned hoop skirt into any street or on any sidewalk, under penalty of a five- dollar fine for each offense.

Harper Woods

 

  • It is illegal to paint sparrows to sell them as parakeets.

 

Kalamazoo
  • It is against the law to serenade your girlfriend.
Rochester
  • All bathing suits must have been inspected by the head of police.
Soo
  • Smoking while in bed is illegal.
Wayland
  • Anyone can keep their cow on Main Street downtown at a cost of 3 cents per day.

Minnesota
 
 
  • A person may not cross state lines with a duck atop his head.
  • It is illegal to sleep naked.
  • All men driving motorcycles must wear shirts.
  • Citizens may not enter Wisconsin with a chicken on their head.
  • Oral sex is prohibited.
  • All bathtubs must have feet.
 
  Hibbing
  • It shall be the duty of any policeman or any other officer to enforce the provisions of this Section, and if any cat is found running at large, or which is found in any street, alley or public place, it shall be the duty of any policeman or other officer of the city to kill such cat.
Minneapolis
  • Red cars can not drive down Lake Street 
St. Cloud
  • Hamburgers may not be eaten on Sundays.
Virginia
  • You're not allowed to park your elephant on Main Street.

Mississippi
 
 
  • Cattle rustling is punishable by hanging.
  • Horses are not to be housed within 50 feet of any road.
  • Adultery or Fornication (living togeather while not married or having sex with someone that is not your spouse) results in a fine of $500 and/or 6 months in prison. -Sec. 97-29-1
  • Vagrancy is punishable by either 30 days in prison or a $201 fine. -Sec. 97-35-37
  • Unnatural intercourse, if both parties voluntarily participate, results in a maximum sentence of 10 years and $10,000. -Sec. 97-29-59
  • It is illegal for a male to be sexually aroused in public.
 
  Columbus
  • The fine for waving a gun in public is higher than actually shooting it.
Oxford
  • It is illegal to drive around the town square more than 100 times in a single session.
  • One may not spit on the sidewalks on the square.
  • Motor vehicles on the square are prohibited.
  • Horn honking is not permitted as it might scare horses.
Tylertown
  • It is unlawful to shave in the center of main street.

Missouri
 
 
  • It is illegal to have oral sex.
  • It is not illegal to speed. (Repealed)
 
  Buckner
  • In this small town of only 4,000, yard waste may be burned any day except Sunday.
Excelsior Springs
  • Hard objects may not be thrown by hand.
  • Worrying squirrels is not tolerated.
Kansas City
  • Minors are not allowed to purchase cap pistols, however they may buy shotguns freely.
  • Installation of bathtubs with four legs resembling animal paws is prohibited.
Marceline
  • Minors can buy rolling paper and tobacco but not lighters.
Marquette
  • It is illegal for more than four unrelated persons to occupy the same dwelling (The Brothel Law).
Mole
  • Frightening a baby is in violation of the law.
Natchez
  • It shall be unlawful to provide beer or other intoxicants to elephants.
Purdy
  • Dancing is strictly prohibited.
St. Louis
  • It's illegal to sit on the curb of any city street and drink beer from a bucket.  This law refers back to the extinct Italian celebration, Hill Day, when beer was served in buckets.
  • A milk man may not run while on duty.
University City
  • Four women may not rent an apartment together.

Montana
 
 
  • Seven or more indians are considered a raiding or war party and it is legal to shoot them. (Repealed)
  • It is illegal for a man and a woman to have sex in any other position other than missionary style. (Repealed)
  • In Montana, it is illegal for married women to go fishing alone on Sundays, and illegal for unmarried women to fish alone at all.
  • It is a misdemeanor to show movies that depict acts of felonious crime.
  • It is a felony for a wife to open her husband's mail.
  • It is illegal to have a sheep in the cab of your truck without a chaperone.
 
  Excelsior Springs
  • Balls may not be thrown within the city limits. 
Helena
  • No item may be thrown across a street.
Salisbury
  • Pop bottles are not to be thrown on the ground.
Whitehall
  • It is illegal to operate a vehicle with ice picks attached to the wheels.

Nebraska
 
 
  • If a child burps during church, his parent may be arrested.
  • It is Illegal to go whale fishing.
  • It is illegal for bar owners to sell beer unless they are simultaneously brewing a kettle of soup.
  • It is illegal for a mother to give her daughter a perm without a state license.
 
  Lehigh
  • Doughnut holes may not be sold
Omaha
  • Sneezing or burping is illegal during a church service.
  • A man is not allowed to run around with a shaved chest.
Waterloo
  • Barbers are forbidden from eating onions between 7 A.M. and 7 P.M.

Nevada
 
 
  • It's still "legal" to hang someone for shooting your dog on your property.
  • It is illegal to drive a camel on the highway.
 
  Clark County
  • An ordinance makes bringing a concealable fire arm into the county illegal unless it is registered with the Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department. In order to register a handgun, however, it must be brought in to the police station. Furthermore, you may not register a gun on the weekends, but the police may prosecute you at that time.
Elko
  • Everyone walking the streets is required to wear a mask.
Eureka
  • Men who wear moustaches are forbidden from kissing women.
Nyala
  • A man is forbidden from buying drinks for more than three people other than himself at any one period during the day.

New Hampshire
 
 
  • You may not tap your feet, nod your head, or in any way keep time to the music in a tavern, restaurant, or cafe.
  • You cannot sell the clothes you are wearing to pay off a gambling debt.
  • It is considered an offense to check into a hotel under an assumed name.
  • It is illegal to pick seaweed up off of the beach.
  • Any cattle that crosses state roads must be fitted with a device to gather its feces.
  • You may not run machinery on Sundays.
  • On Sundays citizens may not relieve themselves while looking up.
 
  White Mountain Nat. Forest
  • If a person is caught raking the beaches, picking up litter, hauling away trash, building a bench for the park, or many other kind things without a permit, he/she may be fined $150 for ''maintaining the national forest without a permit''.

New Jersey
 
 
  • You cannot pump your own gas. All gas stations are full service and full service only. [Reader Comments on this Law.]
  • On a highway you can not park under a bridge.
  • It is against the law for a man to knit during the fishing season.
  • It is against the law to "frown" at a police officer.
  • If you have been convicted of driving while intoxicated, you may never again apply for personalized license plates.
  • Car dealerships are forbidden from opening on Sunday.
  • You may not slurp your soup.
  • Automobiles are not to pass horse drawn carriages on the street.
  • It is illegal to delay or detain a homing pigeon.
 
 

Bernards Township

  • It is illegal to frown as the town is a "Frown-Free Town Zone".

Caldwell

  • You may not dance or wear shorts on the main avenue.
Cranford
  • Citizens are not permitted to park their own boat on their lawn.
Cresskill
  • All cats must wear three bells to warn birds of their whereabouts.

Elizabeth

  • It is forbidden for a woman, on a Sunday, to walk down Broad Street without wearing a petticoat.
Manville
  • It is illegal to offer whiskey or cigarettes to animals a the local zoo.
Newark
  • It is illegal to sell ice cream after 6pm, unless the customer has a note from his doctor.
Ocean City
  • People may not slurp their soup.
  • Pinball machines are not to be played on Sunday.
  • Raw hamburger may not be sold.
Raritan
  • Profanity is prohibited.
Sea Isle City
  • There will be no boiling of bones on the property.
Trenton
  • You may not throw a bad pickle in the street.
  • Pickles are not to be consumed on Sundays.

New Mexico
 
 
  • State officials ordered 400 words of "sexually explicit material" to be cut from Romeo and Juliet.
 
  Carrizozo
  • It's forbidden for a female to appear unshaven in public.
Las Cruces
  • You may not carry a lunchbox down Main Street.

New York

 
 
  • A fine of $25 can be levied for flirting. This old law specifically prohibits men from turning around on any city street and looking "at a woman in that way." A second conviction for a crime of this magnitude calls for the violating male to be forced to wear a "pair of horse-blinders" wherever and whenever he goes outside for a stroll.
  • It is against the law to throw a ball at someone's head for fun.
  • A license must be purchased before hanging clothes on a clothesline.
  • The penalty for jumping off a building is death.
  • New Yorkers cannot dissolve a marriage for irreconcilable differences, unless they both agree to it. That rarely happens, since one party regularly says "no" to the other, or there wouldn't be a reason to dissolve the marriage. If one of the spouses says "no" to the divorce, the other party has to prove that the spouse saying "no" was at fault. Fault could be one of four terrible things. If the spouse has abandoned the other spouse, that is, left the house for a year or if there hasn't been sexual relations for a year (how do you prove that?). Another one of the four terrible things, an oft cited fault, is to assert that the spouse has treated the other spouse with physical or mental cruelty. This is usually the case in most deteriorating marriages, but for the court's purposes, yelling and screaming is not usually enough; pictures of bruises taken in the emergency room might suffice. Divorce will be easy if the spouse has been imprisoned for two or three years. Much more difficult is the last fault, adultery. This keeps a lot of private detectives in business, since lipstick on the collar is not proof. It also means that lawyers get paid to "prove" fault, or on the other side, to show how lame the opposing side's "fault" claim is.
  • A person may not walk around on Sundays with an ice cream cone in his/her pocket.
  • While riding in an elevator, one must talk to no one, and fold his hands while looking toward the door.
  • Slippers are not to be worn after 10:00 P.M.
 
  Carmel
  • A man can't go outside while wearing a jacket and pants that do not match.
Greene
  • During a concert, it is illegal to eat peanuts and walk backwards on the sidewalks.
New York
  • Citizens may not greet each other by "putting one's thumb to the nose and wiggling the fingers".
  • It is illegal for a woman to be on the street wearing "body hugging clothing."
  • You may not smoke within 100 feet of the entrance to a public building.
  • Women may go topless in public, providing it is not being used as a business.
Staten Island
  • You may only water your lawn if the hose is held in your hand.
  • It is illegal for a father to call his son a "faggot" or "queer" in an effort to curb "girlie behavior."

North Carolina
 
 
  • It's against the law to sing off key.
  • Elephants may not be used to plow cotton fields.
  • While having sex, you must stay in the missionary position and have the shades pulled.
  • If a man and a woman who aren't married go to a hotel/motel and register themselves as married then, according to state law, they are legally married.
  • All couples staying overnight in a hotel must have a room with double beds that are at least two feet apart. Making love in the space between the beds is strictly forbidden.
  • It is illegal to have sex in a churchyard.
  • Oral sex is considered a crime against nature.
  • A marriage can be declared void if either of the two persons is physically impotent.
 
  Barber
  • Fights between cats and dogs are prohibited.
Chapel Hill
  • It is a misdemeanor to urinate or defecate publicly.
Charlotte
  • Women must have their bodies covered by at least 16 yards of cloth at all times.
Elon College
  • There is to be no rollerblading during daylight hours, on the roads, or on the bricks. All the sidewalks at this college are made of brick. (Repealed in 1998)
Forest City
  • You must stop and call City Hall before entering town in an automobile. This is so the townspeople will have time to go out and hold their horses until you get through town.
Greensboro
  • Restaurants "with on sidewalk dining" must post their menu so that it is clearly readable from the sidewalk, but is not readable from the street.
Hornytown
  • Massage parlors have been banned.
Kill Devil Hills
  • You may not ride a bicycle without having both your hands on the handle bars.
Rocky Mount
  • It is required that you must pay a property tax on your dog.
Southern Shores
  • It is against the law to rollerblade on a state highway.

North Dakota
 
 
  • Beer and pretzels can't be served at the same time in any bar or restaurant.
  • It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep with your shoes on.
  • It is legal to shoot an Indian on horseback, provided you are in a covered wagon
 
 

Fargo

  • One may be jailed for wearing a hat while dancing, or even for wearing a hat to a function where dancing is taking place.

Ohio
 
 
  • In Ohio, if you ignore an orator on Decoration day to such an extent as to publicly play croquet or pitch horseshoes within one mile of the speaker's stand, you can be fined $25.00.
  • Women are prohibited from wearing patent leather shoes in public.
  • It is illegal to fish for whales on Sunday.
  • It is illegal to get a fish drunk.
  • The Ohio driver's education manual states that you must honk the horn whenever you pass another car.
  • Participating or conducting a duel is prohibited.
  • Breast feeding is not allowed in public.
  • It is illegal for more than five women to live in a house.
  • It is illegal to mistreat anything of great importance.
  • Owners of tigers must notify authorities within one hour if the tiger escapes.
  • No one may be arrested on Sunday or on the Fourth of July.
 
  Bay Village
  • It is illegal to walk a cow down Lake Road.
Bexley
  • Ordinance number 223, of 09/09/19 prohibits the installation and usage of slot machines in outhouses.
Cincinnati
  • Anal intercourse is banned.
Clinton County
  • Any person who leans against a public building will be subject to fines.
Cleveland
  • It's illegal to catch mice without a hunting license!
  • Women are forbidden from wearing patent leather shoes, lest men see reflections of their underwear.
Columbus
  • It is illegal for stores to sell corn flakes on Sunday.
Fairview Park
  • It's against the law to honk your horn "excessively". A grandmother was fined for honking her horn twice at her neighbor.
  • Items left on a tree lawn become city property. A young man was fined for removing an item from a tree lawn even though he had the owner's permission.
Ironton
  • Cross-dressing is against the law.
Lima
  • Any map that does not have Lima clearly stated on the map cannot be sold.
Lowell
  • It is unlawful to run a horse over five miles per hour.
Marion
  • You cannot eat a doughnut and walk backwards on a city street.

North Canton

 

  • It is against the law to roller skate without notifying the police.

 

McDonald
  • Your goose may not paraded down Main Street.

    Oxford
    • It's illegal for a woman to strip off her clothing while standing in front of a man's picture.
    Paulding
    • A policeman may bite a dog to quiet him.
    Toledo
    • Throwing a snake at anyone is illegal.
    Strongsville
    • Catch 22 is banned.
    Youngstown
    • Riding on the roof of a taxi cab is not allowed.
    • You may not run out of gas.

Oklahoma
 
 
  • Violators can be fined, arrested or jailed for making ugly faces at a dog.
  • Females are forbidden from doing their own hair without being licensed by the state.
  • Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to congregate in groups of three or more on private property.
  • Oklahoma will not tolerate anyone taking a bite out of another's hamburger.
  • It is against the law to read a comic book while operating a motor vehicle.
  • Whaling is illegal.
  • It is illegal to have the hind legs of farm animals in your boots.
  • Residents are taxed for the furniture in their homes, and any other personal belongings. (Repealed 1998)
  • People who make "ugly faces" at dogs may be fined and/or jailed.
  • Cars must be tethered outside of public buildings. (Repealed)
  • Oral sex is a misdemeanor and is punisable by one year in jail and a $2,500 fine.
  • Anyone arrested for soliciting a hooker must have their name and picture shown on television.
  • It's statutory rape for a man over 18 to have sex with a female under the age of 18, provided she's a virgin.  If she's not a virgin, it is okay, but the said person must be over 16.  If both parties are under 18, then the law does not apply.
  • Tattoos are banned.
  • No one may spit on a sidewalk.
  • It is illegal to wear your boots to bed.
  • It is illegal to have sex before you are married.
  • Fish may not be contained in fishbowls while on a public bus.
  • Tissues are not to be found in the back of one's car.
 
 

Ada

  • If you wear New York Jets clothing, you may be put in jail.

Clinton

  • Molesting an automobile is illegal.

Hawthahorne

  • It is unlawful to put any hypnotized person in a display window.

Oklahoma City

  • No one may walk backwards downtown while eating a hamburger.

Schulter

  • Women may not gamble in the nude, in lingerie, or while wearing a towel.

Tulsa

  • You may not open a soda bottle without the supervision of a licensed engineer.
  • Elephants are not to be taken into the downtown area.

Wynona

  • One's mode of transportation must be tied up while not attended.
  • Mules may not drink out of bird baths.
  • Clothes may not be washed in bird baths.

Yukon

  • It is illegal to tie a horse in front of city hall.
  • While passing another vehicle, you must honk your horn.

Oregon
 
 
  • Dishes must drip dry.
  • The "Peer Review Statute" prohibits you from finding out details of any written or oral discussion about your medical treatment. Not even a court of law can. All you can access is what the doctor or nurse voluntarily records in your chart.
  • It is illegal to whisper "dirty" things in your lover's ear during sex.
  • It is illegal to buy or sell marijuana, but it is legal to smoke it on your own property.
  • Ice cream may not be eaten on Sundays.
  • You may not pump your own gas in service stations.
  • One may not bathe without wearing "suitable clothing," i.e.,that which covers one's body from neck to knee.
  • Canned corn is not to be used as bait for fishing.
 
  Beaverton
  • You must buy a $10 permit to be allowed to install a burglar alarm.
Eugene
  • It is illegal to show movies or attend a car race on Sundays. (Repealed in the 1970s)
  • It is legal to conduct a horse race or a symphony concert.
Hood River
  • Juggling is strictly prohibited without a license.
Klamath Falls
  • It's illegal to walk down a sidewalk and knock a snakes head off with your cane.
Portland
  • It's against the law for a wedding ceremony to be performed at a skating rink. (Repealed in 1989)
  • People may not whistle underwater.
  • You cannot wear roller skates in restrooms.
Marion
  • Ministers are forbidden from eating garlic or onions before delivering a sermon.
Myrtle Creek
  • One may not box with a kangaroo.
Salem
  • Women may not wrestle in Salem.

Springfield

  • It is illegal to own a reptile within the city limits, unless you are a school or city, as a pet.
Stanfield
  • It is against the law for animals to have sex in the city limits. (Repealed in 1978)
  • Cloth towel dispensers are banned from restrooms.
  • No more than two people may share a single drink.

Pennsylvania
 
 
  • It is contrary to Pennsylvania law to discharge a gun, cannon, revolver or other explosive weapon at a wedding.
  • It is illegal to have over 16 women live in a house together because that constitutes a brothel.  However up to 120 men can live together, without breaking the law.
  • It it illegal to sleep on top of a refrigerator outdoors.
  • Any motorist driving along a country road at night must stop every mile and send up a rocket signal, wait 10 minutes for the road to be cleared of livestock, and continue.
  • A special cleaning ordinance bans housewives from hiding dirt and dust under a rug in a dwelling.
  • You may not sing in the bathtub.
  • Fireworks stores may not sell fireworks to Pennsylvania residents.
  • A person is not eligible to become Governor if he/she has participated in a duel.
  • Any motorist who sights a team of horses coming toward him must pull well off the road, cover his car with a blanket or canvas that blends with the countryside, and let the horses pass. If the horses appear skittish, the motorist must take his car apart, piece by piece, and hide it under the nearest bushes.
  • Ministers are forbidden from performing marriages when either the bride or groom is drunk.
  • No more than two packages of beer at a time may be purchased, unless you are buying from an official "beer distributor"
  • All liquor stores must be run by the state.
  • Motorized vehicles are not to be sold on Sundays.
  • You may not catch a fish with your hands.
  • You may not catch a fish by any body part except the mouth.
  • Dynamite is not to be used to catch fish.
  • Though you do not need a fishing license to fish on your own land, but a hunting license is required to hunt on your own land.
 
  Allentown
  • There is a ban on men becoming aroused in public.
Carlisle
  • In the middle of town, one must pay a fee of $50 dollars a year to park on a particular block. At night, however, the cars must be moved for street cleaning. This law is enforced even if snow or ice prevents the cars from being moved.
Connellsville
  • One's pants may be worn no lower than five inches below the waist.
Danville
  • All fire hydrants must be checked one hour before all fires.
Millville
  • One may not shoot any dog that is found wandering the streets.
  • The sale of alcohol is prohibited.
Morrisville
  • It is required that a woman have a permit to wear cosmetics.
Newtown
  • Every outlet or switch (which can be purchased for 59 cents) that is installed requires an electrical inspection fee of 1 dollar and 33 cents.
Pittsburgh
  • It is still illegal to bring a donkey or a mule onto a trolley car.
  • No one is allowed to sleep on a refrigerator.
Ridley Park
  • You cannot walk backwards eating peanuts in front of the Barnstormers Auditorium during a performance.
Tarentum
  • Horses are not to be tied to parking meters.

Rhode Island
 
 
  • Rhode Island recently applied to the US Government to make all the coastal waters of Rhode Island a "No Discharge Zone". The ostensible purpose was to prohibit the discharge of sewage by boats into the state's waters. However, discharge of raw sewage into the state waters was already illegal. What the "No Discharge Zone" actually did was make it illegal to discharge TREATED sewage from a boat into state waters. What now happens is that boats (whose treatment systems far outperform municipal sewage treatment plants) are now required to disable their sewage treatment systems, and carry their sewage to a shore-based facility, which then dumps the partially treated sewage back into Rhode Island's coastal waters.
  • It is illegal to challenge someone to a duel, or accept a duel, even it it is never actually fought. Penalty: Imprisonment for one to seven years.
  • Impersonating a town sealer, auctioneer, corder of wood, or a fence-viewer is against the law. Penalty: $20 to $100 fine.
  • It is illegal to place a windmill within twenty-five (25) rods of any traveled street or road.
  • Riding a horse over any public highway for the purpose of racing, or testing the speed of the horse is illegal. Penalty: Maximum $20 fine and imprisonment for 10 days.
  • Exercising any labor, business, or work, or using any game, sport, play, or recreation, or causing any of the above to be done to or by your children, servants, or apprentices on the first day of the week (Sunday) results in a penalty of $5 for the first offense and $10 for the second.
  • Professional sports, except ice polo and hockey, must obtain a license to play games on Sunday.
  • Any marriage where either of the parties is an idiot or lunatic is null and void. -SECTION 11-40-1
  • It is illegal to coast downhill in your car with your transmission in neutral, or with the clutch disengaged.
  • It is considered an offense to throw pickle juice on a trolley.
 
  Newport
  • You cannot smoke a pipe after sunset.
Providence
  • There is not an appeals process for exemtion of property tax due to a disability or poverty.
  • It is illegal to wear transparent clothing.
  • You may not sell toothpaste and a toothbrush to the same customer on a Sunday.
West Warwick
  • It is illegal to use water on even-numbered days for the sole purpose of watering plants, gardens, or lawns. If you break this law there is a fine of $25-$100.

South Carolina
 
 
  • It is a capital offense to inadvertently kill someone while attempting suicide.
  • Every adult male must bring a rifle to church on Sunday in order to ward off Indian attacks.
  • It is perfectly legal to beat your wife on the court house steps on Sundays.
  • When approaching a four way or blind intersection in a non-horse driven vehicle you must stop 100 ft from the intersection and discharge a firearm into the air to warn horse traffic.
  • It is illegal to give or receive oral sex in South Carolina.
  • It is illegal to sell any alcoholic beverages on Sunday, unless you own a private club.
  • Horses may not be kept in bathtubs.
  • It is considered an offense to get a tattoo.
  • Performing a U-turn within 1,000 feet of an intersection is illegal.
  • Musical instruments may not be sold on Sunday.
  • No work may be done on Sunday.
  • An exception to the above law is that light bulbs may be sold.
  • All schools must prepare a suitable program for Francis Willard Day.
  • Dance halls may not operate on Sundays.
  • Merchandise may not be sold within a half mile of a church unless fruit is being sold.
  • Fortune tellers are required to obtain a special permit from the state.
  • A railroad my not remove itself from a town of more than five hundred people.
  • Railroad companies may be held liable in some instances for scaring horses.
  • By law, if a man promises to marry an unmarried woman, the marriage must take place.
  • It is illegal to communicate with a woman using obscene messages.
  • It is illegal to display a confederate flag on a courthouse.
 
  Charleston
  • It is against the law to drive a motorized vehicle on King Street.
  • The Fire Department may blow up your house.  This law was made so that the fire department could create a fire brake.
Fountain Inn
  • Horses are to wear pants at all times.
Lancaster County
  • It is illegal to dance in public in Lancaster.
Spartanburg
  • Eating watermelons in the Magnolia Street cemetery is forbidden.

South Dakota
 
 
  • No horses are allowed into Fountain Inn unless they are wearing pants.
  • It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep in a cheese factory.
  • Movies that show police officers being struck, beaten, or treated in an offensive manner are forbidden.
  • If there are more than 5 Native Americans on your property you may shoot them.
 
 

Spearfish

  • If three or more Indians are walking down the street together, they can be considered a war party and fired upon.

Tennessee
 
 
  • You can't shoot any game other than whales from a moving automobile.
  • Hollow logs may not be sold.
  • Any person crippling, killing or in any way destroying a proud bitch that is running at large shall not be held liable for the damages due to such killing or destruction.
  • More than 8 women may not live in the same house because that would constitute a brothel.
  • It is illegal to use a lasso to catch a fish.
  • "Crimes against nature" are prohibited.
  • Giving and receiving oral sex is still prohibited by law.
  • Stealing a horse is punishible by hanging.
  • Driving is not to be done while asleep.
  • The age of consent is 16, but 12 if the girl is a virgin.
  • It is legal to gather and consume roadkill.
 
  Dyersburg
  • It is illegal for a woman to call a man for a date.
Fayette County
  • You may not have more than five inoperable vehicles on a piece of property.
Lenoir City
  • When you pull up to a stop sign you must fire a gun out the window to warn horse carriages that you are coming.
Lexington
  • No one may eat ice cream on the sidewalk.
  • Spitting on the sidewalk is prohibited.
Knoxville
  • In front of their buildings, all businesses must have a "hitching post."
Memphis
  • Illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or walking in front of it waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians.
  • It's illegal for frogs to croak after 11 PM.
  • Panhandlers must first obtain a $10 permit before begging on the streets of downtown Memphis. (Passed in 1996)
  • It is illegal to give any pie to fellow diners. It is also illegal to take unfinished pie home. All pie must be eaten on the premises.
Nashville
  • Males may not be sexually aroused in public.
Oneida
  • An ordinance forbids anyone to sing the song "It Ain't Goin' To Rain No Mo'."

Texas
 
 
  • When two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone.
  • A city ordinance states that a person cannot go barefoot without first obtaining a special five-dollar permit.
  • It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.
  • You can be legally married by publically introducing a person as your husband or wife 3 times.
  • It is illegal to drive without windshield wipers. You don't need a windshield, but you must have the wipers.
  • It is illegal for one to shoot a buffalo from the second story of a hotel.
  • It is illegal to milk another person's cow.
  • A recently passed anticrime law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed.
  • It is unlawful for a person to consume an alcoholic beverage while operating a motor vehicle upon a public roadway, if the person is observed doing so by a peace officer.
  • The entire Encyclopedia Britannica is banned in Texas because it contains a formula for making beer at home.
 
  Abilene
  • It is illegal to idle or loiter anyplace within the corporate limits of the city for the purpose of flirting or mashing.
Austin
  • Wire cutters can not be carried in your pocket.
Beaumont
  • Collegiate football is banned at Lamar University.
Borger
  • It is against the law to throw confetti, rubber balls, feather dusters, whips or quirts (riding crop), and explosive firecrackers of any kind.
Clarendon
  • It is illegal to dust any public building with a feather duster.
Dallas
  • It's illegal to possess realistic dildos.
El Paso
  • Churches, hotels, halls of assembly, stores, markets, banking rooms, railroad depots, and saloons are required to provide spittoons "of a kind and number to efficiently contain expectorations into them."
Houston
  • Beer may not be purchased after midnight on a Sunday, but it may be purchased on Monday.
  • It is illegal to sell Limburger cheese on Sunday.
Jasper
  • Dogs must be on a leash at ALL times. Fine of 100 dollars.
LeFors
  • It is illegal to take more than three swallows of beer while standing.

Lubbock County

  • It is illegal to drive within an arm's length of alcohol - including alcohol in someone else's blood stream.
Mesquite
  • It is illegal for children to have unusual haircuts.
Port Arthur
  • Obnoxious odors may not be emitted while in an elevator. 
Richardson
  • It is now illegal to place a "for sale" sign on a car if it visible from the street.
  • It is illegal to do "U Turns".
San Antonio
  • It is illegal for both sexes to flirt or respond to flirtation using the eyes and/or hands.
  • It is illegal to urinate on the Alamo.
Temple
  • No one may ride a horse and buggy through the town square.
  • You can ride your horse in the saloon.
  • Cattle thieves may be hanged on the spot.
Texarkana
  • Owners of horses may not ride them at night without tail lights.

Utah
 
 
  • It is against the law to fish from horseback.
  • When a person reaches the age of 50, he/she can then marry their cousin.
  • It is illegal not to drink milk.
  • It is illegal to detonate any nuclear weapon. You can have them, but you just can't detonate them.
  • Birds have the right of way on all highways.
  • A husband is responsible for every criminal act committed by his wife while she is in his presence.
  • You're not allowed to sell beverages containing more than 3.2% alcohol.
  • It's legal for restaurants to serve wine with meals, but only if you ask for the wine list.
  • It is considered an offense to hunt whales.
  • No one may have sex in the back of an ambulance if it is responding to an emergency call.
 
  Kaysville
  • You must have identification to enter a convienence store after dark.
Logan
  • Women may not swear.
Monroe
  • Daylight must be visible between partners on a dance floor.
Provo
  • Throwing snowballs will result in a $50 fine.
Salt Lake City
  • No one may walk down the street carrying a paper bag containing a violin.
Tremonton
  • It is illegal to have sex in a moving ambulance and if you are caught the guy is let go and the woman is punished and her name appears in the newspaper.
Trout Creek
  • Pharmacists may not sell gunpowder to cure headaches.

Utah
 
 
  • It is against the law to fish from horseback.
  • When a person reaches the age of 50, he/she can then marry their cousin.
  • It is illegal not to drink milk.
  • It is illegal to detonate any nuclear weapon. You can have them, but you just can't detonate them.
  • Birds have the right of way on all highways.
  • A husband is responsible for every criminal act committed by his wife while she is in his presence.
  • You're not allowed to sell beverages containing more than 3.2% alcohol.
  • It's legal for restaurants to serve wine with meals, but only if you ask for the wine list.
  • It is considered an offense to hunt whales.
  • No one may have sex in the back of an ambulance if it is responding to an emergency call.
  Kaysville
  • You must have identification to enter a convienence store after dark.
Logan
  • Women may not swear.
Monroe
  • Daylight must be visible between partners on a dance floor.
Provo
  • Throwing snowballs will result in a $50 fine.
Salt Lake City
  • No one may walk down the street carrying a paper bag containing a violin.
Tremonton
  • It is illegal to have sex in a moving ambulance and if you are caught the guy is let go and the woman is punished and her name appears in the newspaper.
Trout Creek
  • Pharmacists may not sell gunpowder to cure headaches.

Virginia
 
 
  • Not only is it illegal to have sex with the lights on, one may not have sex in any position other than missionary.
  • It is illegal to sell peanut brittle on Sundays. (Repealed)
  • You cannot sell lettuce on Sunday, but you can sell beer, wine etc. (Repealed)
  • There is a state law prohibiting "corrupt practices of bribery by any person other than candidates."
  • You may not work on Sunday. (Repealed)
  • It is illegal to spit on sidewalk.
  • If one is not married, it is illegal for him to have sexual relations.
  • You may not have oral or anal sex.
  • Driving while not wearing shoes is prohibited. (Repealed)
  • Police radar detectors are illegal.
  • Citizens must honk their horn while passing other cars.
  • Children are not to go trick-or-treating on Halloween.
  • It is illegal to tickle women.
  • You cannot buy hardware of any kind on Sunday.  (Passed in 1975, repealed in 1977)
 
  Culpeper
  • No one may wash a mule on the sidewalk.
Dayton
  • A person of color may not be oustide or within the city limits after 7 pm.
Lebanon
  • It is illegal to kick your wife out of bed.
Norfolk
  • Spitting on a sea gull is not tolerated.
  • A man may face 60 days in jail for patting a woman's derriere.
  • Women must wear a corsette after sundown and be in the company of male chaperone.
Richmond
  • It is illegal to flip a coin in a restaurant to see who pays for a coffee.
Stafford County
  • It is legal for a man to beat his wife on the courthouse steps so long as it is before 8:00 pm.
Victoria
  • It is illegal to skate down the sidewalk of Main Street.
Virginia Beach
  • If you are drunk and not driving your car, and the person who is driving the car is drunk as well, you may both receive DUI's.
  • It is illegal for a person to ride on the handlebars of a bike.
Waynesboro
  • It is illegal for a woman to drive a car up Main Street unless her husband is walking in front of the car waving a red flag.

Washington
 
 
  • All lollipops are banned.
  • A law to reduce crime states: "It is mandatory for a motorist with criminal intentions to stop at the city limits and telephone the chief of police as he is entering the town."
  • It is illegal to paint polka dots on the American flag.
  • People may not buy a mattress on Sunday.
  • All motor vehicles must be preceded by a man carrying a red flag (daytime) or a red lantern (nighttime) fifty feet in front of said vehicle.
  • It is illegal to pretend that one's parents are rich.
  • You are not allowed to breast feed in public.
  • When two trains come to a crossing, neither shall go until the other has passed.
  • You are breaking the law if you sell or place in the stream of commerce a crib that has: corner posts that extend more than 1/16-inch above end panels; slats more than 2 3/8 inches apart; a mattress support that releases easily from corner posts; cutout designs on the end panels; tears in mesh or fabric; missing or loose screws, bolts, or hardware; sharp edges, points, or rough surfaces on wood surfaces that are not smooth and free from splinters, splits or cracks. The new Infant Crib Safety Act in California (AB 3760, Speier), Colorado (SB 98-023,Pascoe and Morrison) and Washington State (SSB 6229, Kohl and Pennington) states that "no commercial user shall manufacture, retrofit, sell, contract to sell or resell, lease, sublet or otherwise place in the stream of commerce, a full-size or non-full-size crib that is unsafe for any infant using the crib.
  • You cannot buy meat of any kind on Sunday.
 
  Auburn
  • Men who deflower virgins, regardless of age or marital status, may face up to five years in jail.
Bremerton
  • You may not shuck peanuts on the street.
Everett
  • It is illegal to display a hypnotized or allegedly hypnotized person in a store window.
Lynden
  • Dancing and drinking may not occur at the same establishment.
Seattle
  • You may not carry a concealed weapon that is over six feet in length.
  • Women who sit on men's laps on buses or trains without placing a pillow between them face an automatic six-month jail term.
  • No one may set fire to another person's property without prior permission.
  • It is illegal to carry a fishbowl or aquarium onto a bus because the sound of the water sloshing may disturb other passengers.
Spokane
  • TV's may not be bought on Sundays.
Waldron Island
  • No structure shall contain more than two toilets that use potable water for flushing. -San Juan County Ordinance NO. 7 -1995 (Passed June 7,1995)
Wilbur
  • You may not ride an ugly horse.

West Virginia
 
 
  • No children may attend school with their breath smelling of "wild onions."
  • When a railroad passes within 1 mile of a community of 100 or more people in it, they must build a station and stop there regularly to pick up and drop off passengers.
  • It is legal for a male to have sex with an animal as long as it does not exceed 40 lbs.
  • It is illegal to snooze on a train.
  • Doctors and dentists may not place a woman under anesthesia unless a third person is present.
  • According to the state constitution, it is unlawful for anyone to own a red or a black flag.
  • If you wear a hat inside a theater, you may be fined.
  • Roadkill may be taken home for supper.
  • Whistling underwater is prohibited.
 
  Alderson
  • One may not walk a lion, tiger or leopard, even on a leash.
Nicholas County
  • No member of the clergy is allowed to tell jokes or humorous stories from the pulpit during a church service.
Huntington
  • Firemen may not whistle or flirt at any woman passing a firehouse.
  • It is legal to beat your wife so long as it is done in public on Sunday, on the courthouse steps.

Wisconsin
 
 
  • You must manually flush all urinals in a building.
  • Butter substitutes are not allowed to be served in state prisons.
  • Citizens may not murder their enemies.
  • Whenever two trains meet at an intersection of said tracks, neither shall proceed until the other has.
  • As people used to smuggle it in from Illinois, all yellow butter substitute is banned.
  • Condoms were considered an obsene article and had to hidden behind the pharmacist's counter.
  • At one time, margarine was illegal.
  • State Law made it illegal to serve apple pie in public restaurants without cheese.
  • The state definition of rape stated that it was a man having sex with a woman he knows not to be his wife. That would mean that women could not be guilty of rape and neither could men who thought they were married to the woman.
  • While all cheese making requires a license, Limburger cheese making requires a master cheese maker's license.
  • It is illegal to kiss on a train.
  • It is illegal to cut a woman's hair.
  • Car dealerships cannot sell cars on Sunday.
 
  Kenosha
  • No male is allowed to be in a state of arousal in public.
La Crosse
  • It is illegal to tie up your horse along Third Street (Now a major bar strip).
  • It is illegal to display an unclothed mannequin in a store window.
  • It is illegal to play checkers in public.
  • You cannot "worry a squirrel."
Milwaukee
  • An old ordinance forbids parking for over two hours unless a horse is tied to the car.
  • It is against the law to play a flute and drums on the streets to attract attention.
  • If one is thought of as offensive looking, it is illegal for him to be in public during the day.
  • It is illegal to purchase or use Sparklers in the city, yet you can buy fully disassembled automatic machine guns.
Racine
  • It is illegal to wake a fireman when he is asleep.
  • Women may not walk down a public street at night without being accompanied by a man.
St. Croix
  • Women are not allowed to wear anything red in public.

Wyoming
 
 

 

  • It is illegal to wear a hat that obstructs people's view in a public theater or place of amusement.

  • It is illegal for women to stand within five feet of a bar while drinking.

  • You may not take a picture of a rabbit during the month of June.

 
  Cheyenne
  • Citizens may not take showers on Wednesdays.